Wednesday 23 March 2016

My Fabulous Life

When it comes to kitchen waste bins, I'm sure we're all agreed that the old-established Dutch firm of Brabantia, with its elegant bins and (important, this) cleverly designed bags, has got it cracked. For some years I've been more than happy with our slimline 20L pedal bin - happy in this case meaning never having to give it a second thought (except once in a while to admire its perfection and wipe down its cool matt surface). This morning, however, when I took out the full bag - such a neat and easy process with Brabantia - I noticed that something was printed, in large upper-case letters, on said bag (and on the rest of the batch - I checked). It read 'BEWARE! CONTAINS EVIDENCE OF A FABULOUS LIFE.' These words are attributed to one Emily Jayne Phipps, of whom I know nothing. What on earth is she talking about, and how did her message end up on Brabantia's beautifully engineered rubbish bags? Believe me, Emily Jayne, it would take a remarkable feat of reverse engineering to work back from the contents of our rubbish bags to a life in any way fabulous. However, it put me in mind of a Randy Newman song, which is never a bad thing - this one...

7 comments:

  1. Love that Randy Newman album, especially 'I love LA' I came home one day to find Mrs W had replaced the Brabantia in the kitchen with two metal bins whose lids have sensors that whirr to an open position whenever you get within 20 feet of them. It's like living with a couple of Mash means Smash robots!

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  2. The only thing they don't do is cackle

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  3. Ha ha - never a good idea to stray far from the Brabantian Ideal...

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  4. For once Nige you are behind the curve. Here in Mahlerworld we favour the 30 litre Touch Bin in moody matt-black, accepting the 'G'bag. The 'fab life' script was a runner-up in a competition run by these Dutch wizards. The winner I didn't care for, but a personal favourite was another runner-up 'Ich bin ein binliner'.

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  5. "Ich bin ein binliner" is brilliant - I'd be happy with that on my bags. I've flirted with the G-bag touch bin, MM, but found it just that bit too large, and Mrs N didn't care for it (which is usually a decisive factor in these matters)...

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  6. The dynamic is much the same with Mrs MM but, when it comes to garbage a man has to stand tall and do the right thing. Right now, c/o this exchange, you will almost certainly go to that great landfill in the sky unsure of whether you should have gone for the 30 Litre.

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  7. My advice is never to stray from the simplicity and hygiene of a Brabantia pedal bin.

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