Sunday 21 January 2018

Acme

One of Chuck Jones's rules for the animated world inhabited by Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner was that 'All materials, tools, weapons or mechanical conveniences must be obtained from the Acme Corporation' – this despite (or rather because of) Acme products being spectacularly failure-prone, guaranteeing humiliation and/or severe injury for the Coyote every time he tried to use one.
 The other day I was delighted to discover that Acme is still in business here in Wellington, making cups and saucers for the city's innumerable cafĂ©s – and, happily, these particular products function perfectly well.


 I've been seeing a lot of Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner lately, as Sam and Ethan, the New Zealand grandsons, are massive fans. With Summer, the granddaughter back home, equally devoted to Bugs Bunny, that's a clean sweep for Chuck Jones and an impressive demonstration of the enduring power of authentic animation in this age of CGI.

I came out to New Zealand with my trusty Wilkinson Protector 3 but no spare blades, nor were any to be found here. What I did find was a razor of broadly similar appearance, complete with six (count them) three-blade  cartridges, all for the equivalent of £4.50 sterling. Could I resist this? Of course not. Was it too good to be true? Of course it was. My first shave with it left my face peppered with lacerations and coated in a strange kind of slime – presumably the lubricant gel. One contusion was so bloody I had to wear a plaster on my chin all day.
 I suspect this razor was a product of the Acme Corporation.





5 comments:

  1. Dear Sir Nigeness, I think you will find that razor is manufactured by the Hackme Razor Corporation. In case you Brits are unsure...this is a *joke*

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  2. Ha ha - Hackme indeed! Thanks Newman.

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  3. A neighbor of mine some years ago was a salesman for the Acme Corporation, or at least an Acme corporation. I used to joke with his tenant about writing letters of complaint about the product.

    The incompatibility of razor cartridges briefly infuriates me every time I lose a handle--not often, fortunately. I suppose that we could all go back to shaving with straight-edged razors, but my few attempts to use them removed much more skin than whisker. And no doubt it would make transit through airports that much more difficult.

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  4. Thanks George - good to know of real-life Acme salesmen travelling around. An unenviable job...
    The incomparably smooth-shaven Mark Bailey recommends the straight edge as the best shaving solution, but as you say it doesn't go down well in the hand luggage.

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  5. You need this poster! https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/fringefocus/kickstarter-gold-the-acme-corporation

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