It Works!

 It is an oft lamented fact of modern life, at least in 'Broken Britain', that nothing seems to work any more. Lord knows, I've lamented it myself often enough – so it is good to be able to report that I've found at least one thing that still works, and actually works far better than it used to...
  Some time last week I noticed that my passport was running out. Unable to face the dread prospect of applying online (such things never go well for me), I decided to get a passport photo taken and fill in an application form at the post office. So, this Monday past, I presented myself at the photographers' and told them I needed a photo for this purpose – at which point they informed me that the post office – the main post office – did not take passport applications. (This main post office, I should explain, is housed in a branch of W.H. Smith – now renamed T.G. Jones, but still, with Boots, England's joint worst high-street retail chain.) However, this excellent photographers' was happy not only to take my photo there and then but to perform the entire online application process for me, sparing me the pain – I could hardly believe my ears. This was all done in a short time, for a small fee, I handed them my old passport to return to the Passport Office, and went on my way a happy man. What happened next is quite astonishing: after several updates in the course of the week, my new passport was delivered today! I had got a new passport in five days, in an entirely painless process. I'm still blinking and rubbing my eyes incredulously. There is at least one thing, then, that still works in Broken Britain (in addition to that excellent photographers') – and, wonderfully, it's the Passport Office.