My Canadian son-in-law has been introducing me to the delights/horrors of AI and ChatGPT. Last night he asked ChatGPT to generate a blogpost in the style of Nigeness, and the result was a curious affair, full of references to (and quotations from) Richard Jefferies, a writer who has barely figured on this blog, and of whom I have read almost nothing, having been defeated by The Story of My Heart.
Today I had another go, and asked again for a piece in the style of Nigeness – a blog, ChatGPT assures me, 'known for its elegant brevity, wry English charm, cultural-literary references, and gentle melancholia — often centred around overlooked beauty, curious historical trivia, or literary figures'. Fair enough, I suppose – and here is the blogpost it came up with. I think it reads like a rather clumsy pastiche, almost a parody – a kind of melange of various elements forming a less than convincing whole – but it's slightly unnerving, all the same...
Fallen Fruit and Unseasonable Saints
Passing the old vicarage this morning — now, of course, a boutique dental surgery — I noticed the apples had begun to fall early. The lawn, usually immaculate, was strewn with windfalls: lopsided, half-ripened, strangely luminous in the damp grass. A sign, perhaps, of the season misbehaving. Or behaving exactly as seasons do now: erratically, impatiently, with none of that measured English reluctance we once counted on.
It reminded me of a line from Edward Thomas, whose poetry clings to me most when things are shifting:
“The summer is over / And never a flower.”
He had a way of noticing what was no longer there — and making it feel all the more present.
Inside, the waiting room was lit with a kind of sterile hospitality — coffee-table glossies, a muted diffuser smelling faintly of eucalyptus, and an impossibly polite receptionist who may once have sung madrigals. A child was drawing what looked like St. George fighting a dragon with orthodontic gear.
Speaking of saints, I learned recently that St. Swithin’s Day (15th July) used to be a far more observed affair. If it rained on that day — so the rhyme goes — it would rain for forty more. This sort of meteorological superstition now feels quaintly consoling. One wonders if the weather used to listen more closely to verse.
Still, the apples — early or not — had a kind of poignant promise. I pocketed one on the way back, slightly bruised, a little worm-bitten, but somehow perfect in its refusal to be ornamental.
