As the annual work tsunami engulfs NigeCorp - hence my recent sparse blogging - it is of course time for the Office Party. It was last night. The Office Party, sadly, is never in keeping with the grand tradition of NigeCorp celebrations - oxroast, choral singing, orations, downing of bumpers of claret, no heeltaps - but this year the arrangements had apparently been hijacked by the provisional wing of GirlieCorp. As a result, we found ourselves descending ankle-breaking steps into a basement bar that my old friend Cheever pithily described as 'the inside of the White Rabbit's womb'. 'Yes,' I concurred, surveying the decor, 'with a nasty case of fibroids.' All done in shades of beige and cream, with worryingly bedlike, wipe-clean seating and bizarre gestures at Christmas decoration, it looked like a cut-price Winter Wonderland crossed with a swingers' club. And the 'music' - all drum machine, thumping bass and moaning - fitted perfectly, while inedible canapés and sickly, mud-brown cocktails completed the picture. I managed to procure wine (in special easy-spill glasses) but did not, needless to say, stay long. Long enough, though, to feel a little frail this morning - mostly, I think, from lack of food.
Never mind, here are two causes for celebration - Jonathan the tortoise, bless him - and the dear old EU. Having announced that it would 'lead the world' in the matter of carbon-cutting, it has proceeded to lead the world in failing to reach an agreement. I am sure this is a lead the world will indeed follow, if only because, once the thrill of setting impossible targets has faded, it will realise it actually has no choice.
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Good description Nige, of the London equivalent of the Prague hen party.
ReplyDeleteManufacturing's own Works party is the same, incorporating office and shop floor, a lethal mix if there ever was. In the early days I must admit use was made of tongues, loosened by alcohol, to ferret out who was up to what, the trade off being some drunk telling you what they really thought of you.
Eventually I used to put in a one hour appearance and vamoosed, signing the cheque for the night of course.
I've just been informed that for this year's Christmas party, we're 'going Brazilian'. I'm just hoping it's a description of the restaurant and not a waxing. I couldn't walk for weeks the last time.
ReplyDeleteWell, one great thing about being unemployed is that you don't have an annual office party to go to. But your description is priceless, Nige, albeit gross (I'm gonna have a hard time forgetting the fibroids in the White Rabbit's womb!).
ReplyDeleteTonight I'm going downtown to see an exhibit of the work of cartoonist R. Crumb and be taken out to dinner by an okd friend who still has lots of $ (former Philadelphia lawyer -- my own, in fact -- and now a VP at the U. of Penn). I shall enjoy the feast, since the rest of the week around here it's gonna be spam and eggs....