Thursday 24 January 2019

The Gove Tutorial

Since my encounter with Gordon Brown some years ago, politicians have rarely strayed into my dream world. Last night, however, for reasons unknown, I was treated to a double (or triple) visitation. First came Jacob Rees Mogg in all his glory, indeed in rather more glory than usual, as he was sporting a florid waistcoat worthy of Disraeli himself. His uncharacteristically jaunty apparel was matched by his jaunty demeanour as he strolled, nodding affably to right and left, through the pleasant streets of a town that somewhat resembled Cambridge.
  Indeed it must have been Cambridge (dream Cambridge), as the next thing I remember is being one of two students in a cosy tutorial being conducted by none other than Michael Gove – or rather Michael Gove with a touch of Norman St John Stevas. Sitting back in a deep armchair, he was being tremendously polite and affable (and slightly camp), but at the same time oddly enigmatic. The subject of the tutorial appeared to be the development of the classical city. At one point my fellow student, a rather attractive young lady, asked why he was focusing on the classical city. Oddly Gove/Stevas fell silent in the face of this query and seemed mildly discomfited, so after an awkward interval I chipped in with something that seemed to be fit the bill – heaven knows what, but I finished with a flourish on the word 'paradigm'. Gove/Stevas seemed pleased.
 And there it ended, or what I can remember ended. I've no idea what any of it signifies, but I sincerely hope neither Theresa May nor Jeremy Corbyn invades my dream world any time soon. 


  1. Keep taking the tablets Nige - but their efficasy is probably beginning to fade, and you probably need something a bit stronger? If yes, do call me, as I know a very good man...

  2. Wish my dreams were as seemingly intellectual and upmarket as yours. My last one consisted of getting hopelessly lost in a multi storey car park in what was supposed to be Trowbridge and the only person I met was a mute bag lady wearing a teacosy and pushing her possessions about in an Asda trolley. I do not even know if there is a branch of that esteemed emporium in Trowbridge.

  3. Thanks for the offer, Mm – and Karen, are you sure that was a dream? As for 'upmarket and intellectual', most of my regular dreams seem, like yours, to involve getting hopelessly lost...