Tuesday 24 January 2012

Crise? Quel Crise?

With its credit rating downgraded, its economy faltering and the Eurozone in meltdown, it's good to see that France has its mind, as ever, on higher things. Top priority, clearly, is to deal with the ever present menace of Armenian genocide deniers. You know what it's like - you're at a party and someone sidles up to you and starts: 'That Armenian genocide - I tell you straight, squire, that never happened...'
So, having acted decisively to blow diplomatic relations with Turkey out of the water, the French move on, with typical Gallic shrewdness, to cultivate relations with that fast-rising global superpower, the Australasian Tiger, New Zealand - by returning some Maori heads. Good thinking.
Back in Blighty, I've been monitoring the progress of the great cravat revival, so confidently predicted here - oh, years ago... There have been promising signs - for example, I recently spotted a young fellow sporting a well-tied cravat on BBC1's The Magicians - but I think the campaign needs a fiscal boost. So, let's make the cravat tax-exempt, thereby giving it a competitive edge over the tie. There's a cause the French could embrace.
'Qu-est-ce que nous voulons?'
'Nous voulons une exemption de taxe pour les cravates!'
'A quelle heure nous le voulons?'
'Mais nous le voulons maintenant, bien sur!'


  1. Hope the trend doesn't catch on Nige, if they hand back the sack marked 'Napoleons swag' a number of Paris museums will have trouble letting the empty space.
    I note with interest that Louis the umpteenth was a cravat wearer, hope he had a matching Double Two shirt.

  2. That wld be those fancy French lacy cravats Malty - they knew no better... Double Two rang a bell - and they're still making them, it seems!

  3. You should get Benedict Cumberbatch to be the face of your cravat revival campaign. He's red hot right now, and his name sounds like the sort of archaic and very complicated knot that can only be performed by head butlers.

  4. More of a crevette man meself. The two should never be confused, leads to all sorts of nastiness