Wednesday 18 March 2009

Nigeria: Shedding the Toga?

Good news from the Dark Continent - a campaign has been launched to 'rebrand' Nigeria. Somehow this proud nation (The Heart of Africa, Good People: Great Country...) has acquired the reputation of a lawless hellhole ruled over by kleptocratic clans who have diverted vast fortunes to the secret vaults of Switzerland, while the rest of the nation's tireless entrepreneurs devote themselves to the traditional pursuits of spamming, phishing and draining bank accounts. It's a mystery how this false impression got around. Apparently it's a 'toga'. 'We must shed this toga,' says Nigeria's dynamic information minister. Unfortunately, the launch of the rebranding campaign didn't get off to a very good start. Whoops! There's only one thing for it - change the country's name. But to what?... Got it - Aviva!

5 comments:

  1. Shedding the Toga is the new Pushing the Envelope.

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  2. Yes, Nigeria sounds just the place for Sir Fred Goodwin. He could reinvent himself there, perhaps emerging as Sir Toga Wonga, Chairman Emeritus of the Lagos Branch of the Banca di Commercio e la Sacra Spirito. Folks do say that Ghana, next door, is a great place and everything you might wish Nigeria was but isn't. West African music is ace, anyway.

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  3. Lagos harbour was the scene, many years ago of the great cement scam, many ships sitting at anchor, holds full of the finest Portland, slowly going off. Ordered it, oops can't pay for it.
    Lagos airport (I say airport....) was the scene of countless European business operatives struggling down the steps with suitcases full of dollars. The default pre contract manoeuvre.

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  4. An old University chum of mine went home to do his bit for Biafra. None of us ever heard from him again. A long forgotten war, that.

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  5. How about New Nigeria, Herr Blair might find his niche there after his good work in the Middle East.

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